VivahBandhanWhere relationship starts

Marie, a spouse of 15 years, had this to say about her couples counseling experience:

I love Tom. Obviously or I wouldn’t have stayed with him so long. But I stopped liking him and that I couldn’t shake. Tom used to be an idealistic hippie-type, always talking about Mother Earth and freedom for all people. While sometimes it got annoying, it was always an aspect of him I really loved.

Then he “grew up” as he called it. Got a job as an executive in a bank. And over the years, I’ve just seen the life drained out of him. He’s become flat, unemotional, unfunny. I kept waiting for him to change back to the old Tom, but it wasn’t happening.

Once we started couples counseling, bit by bit, I saw the old Tom return. It’s as if his emotional state was frozen and he needed a forum, a space, that was safe to express himself again.

I can’t say enough about counseling. He’s seeing an individual counselor now and I’m so happy for him. I try to make sure he never misses it. You know, I miss the old him but more than that, I want him to be happy again. I couldn’t stand seeing him this way.

Counseling can be many things to many people, but for most therapy is a process of discovery…and sometimes rediscovery. Marie was learning to like her husband again, simply put. Therapy allowed them both to reveal their feelings in a safe, contained environment and grow from there. They were learning to like one another again.

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